Fandom: Red Dragon/The Silence of the Lambs/Hannibal

Pairing: Hannibal Lecter/Will Graham

Rating: R/NC-17

Beta: Malakai_Amlug (thank you very much)

Summary: Sometimes running is not possible as the past catches up with you.

Notes/Warning: This is a slash story which means that it features two grown up men in love with each other and physically expressing this emotion in various forms. If you are in any way or degree homophobic, disgusted, disturbed, feel threatened or weirded out by such a relationship, please do not read any further and don’t write me any stupid e-mails to preach about the wrongs or rights of homosexual relationships.

Disclaimer: The characters portrayed in this story are by no means mine and belong to Thomas Harris. If you want to have some picture as a guideline for what these guys actually look like I would strongly suggest watching the movie versions of the books, which were done by DeLaurentis Pictures. As for the musical help I had with this story. The chapter titles and the paragraphs of lyrics in each chapter are songs composed and performed by Placebo. Therefore they are not mine either. I am not making any money with this and purely do it for my own amusement and entertainment.



CHAPTER ELEVEN - Nancy Boy


“And it all breaks down at the first rehearsal
Got the muse in my head she’s universal”

It was dark outside and the tropical storm bombarded the glass of the windows and the sliding door with its liquid ammunition. The water was no longer running down the flat surface in rivulets but in rivers that soaked the wooden terrace. The wet wood shimmered dangerously and puddles were starting to form on the oversaturated boards.

A flash tore through the charcoal sky and highlighted the rain clouds with a dark purple that was swal-lowed at once by the darkness once the flash disappeared. The short source of light made the water on the glass and on the floorboards sparkle and lent temporary light to the interior of the room.

Will stood at the sliding door and watched the storm releasing its power and shaking the palm tries in its fierce grip. A thunder so loud and powerful it made the windowpanes rattle accompanied the last flash and Will counted the seconds between the next flash and thunder under his breath.

4, 5, 6, …

The bright light had been gone for six seconds before a loud boom filled the night and warned every-one about the dangers outside. This display of primitive power and untamed wildness sent shivers down Will’s spine and he pressed his hands against the cold surface of the glass sliding doors. His breath condensed on the glass and made the outside look foggy and unclear.

There was, in the momentary silence after the last thunder, the sound of movement behind him. Too fascinated and hypnotized by the happenings outside, he ignored any noise from inside the house. Pressing closer against the glass he could almost feel the wetness of the water downpour. Excited he held his breath and pressed closer still.

Suddenly a hand reached out to him. He couldn’t see it and he did not feel it but he knew it was there, trying to get a hold of him as he fell. There was once more the cold but this time it was no glass that sent freezing chills into his body, but icy water that enclosed him. Something was pulling him down into the darkness below him; the light from the surface above grew dimmer. He thought he was able to make out a shadow on the surface though, but he was not entirely sure.

A light headedness set in as the oxygen in his lungs got less and less. For a brief moment he consid-ered the possibility to panic but the heaviness that crept into his limbs and the drowsiness in his brain calmed him almost immediately. He opened his mouth to tell the shape on the surface to stop trying to reach him but salty water filled his mouth and then his lungs.

A loud boom tore through the silence of the room and shook Will out of his sleep. The sound of water hitting against glass was accompanied by the howling wind outside. Consciousness was not much different from the world of dreams apparently. The air inside the room had cooled down from the change in temperature outside but it still it was warm enough to slightly fog the windows.

The slow movement of his pillow warned Will that he was not alone. His waking brain noticed slowly that his mattress as well as his headrest was harder than was to be expected in a bed and there was definitely movement from beneath him.

It took the time of another flash/thunder cycle before Will finally awakened fully and started to recall why his sleeping conditions differed from his usual ones. He wondered if Hannibal was asleep as well but the hand that came to rest on his back and started to slowly stroke him made clear that the older man was awake as well. The blonde felt himself relax from the soothing touches. His body got heavier and it seemed to him that he was starting to melt and mold himself around Hannibal’s body.

Another hand came to rest on his back but this one was much bolder than the first one as it traced Will’s spine to the waistband of his pants. The soft material of the light shirt was lifted a bit and a strong hand slipped between cloth and skin. The touch felt heavier on the skin of his back but the tender contact had a calming effect on the former FBI profiler.

Will rubbed his cheek against the linen covered shoulder under him and started to feel lightheaded. It did not matter that the person caressing him had touched him with the intent to kill in the past; the only thing that mattered right now was the physical closeness to the other and the promise of some-thing he wanted almost too much.

There was another rolling of thunder but this one was distant, indicating that the force of nature was moving on and leaving Port of Spain behind. The rain was still drenching everything in water but it was slowly starting to lose most of its fierceness.

Determination was what prompted Will to make his next move and he tentatively ran his hands up Hannibal’s sides. He first gripped the white shirt but then his fingers slowly climbed up and crawled over the older man’s chest to his throat. All the time he continued to press his face into Hannibal’s shoulder and inhaled the other’s scent.

Hannibal smelled of the herbs the fish had been seasoned with. Underneath there were the remnants of expensive eau de perfume. It had an elegant and graceful scent. Mingling with these smells was the slight scent of sweat. Will had to admit that it was a very alluring scent and he realized that he was starting to get drunk on it.

The hand that had been stroking his back so far was now trailing down to Will’s buttocks and joined the other hand under the shirt. The hands came to a rest and only the thumbs drew lazy circles over the suntanned skin. The gesture had a strange effect on Will. Heat started to spread through his body, it radiated from his lower belly and made him shiver slightly. It was like his skin had suddenly become over-sensitized.

The blonde’s lips parted slightly as the breath escaped in soft toneless pants. Will felt the urge to start to wriggle on top of the older man but he refused to behave so shamelessly. His hands that had been on their way to Hannibal’s face had stopped their way up and retreated back down to the other’s shoulders where they gripped the clothed flesh and held on tight.

Suddenly there was movement underneath him and Hannibal shifted them until Will was lying on his back on the couch. His grip on the shoulders which were now above him did not lessen. The maneu-ver had the effect that Hannibal’s body was now resting heavily on top of him, while his hands were trapped under Will.

“Let go, Will.”


“Alcoholic kind of Mood,
Lose my Clothes, lose my Lube”


The words were no command but they had the same effect. Obediently the blonde released the now wrinkled shirt and his hands dropped to his side.

Hannibal took advantage of his regained freedom of movement and he pulled his hands out from un-derneath the younger man. He pushed his torso up to take a better look at the man under him. Will blinked a couple of times to get the sleep out of his eyes and stared right back.

The lack of proper light made it hard to see details but even though the conditions were not the best, the other’s proximity made sure that Will could make out most of Hannibal’s face. The maroon eyes that had seemed so crimson to him before where now pitch-black in the shadows, only some light spots reflecting on the iris. The younger man reached up to caress the face above him.

He was surprised about his own behavior. It would have been more like him if he would take advan-tage of the situation and if he would try to get away from Hannibal. But Will discarded that thought at once. It was as appealing as doing ‘the right’ thing by taking the piece of paper Alan Bloom had left and giving the FBI a call. It was so much like his past self that he despised it. He had been so trusting back then. He had truly believed that if he always did the right thing, he would lead a happy life.

The thought about him and happiness lured a snort out of him and he smiled wryly up at the face above him. It said a lot about his sheltered childhood and adolescence if he really had believed back then that things would work this way. In the end it had only lead to him tearing himself into pieces to make sure that everyone got what they wanted. The greediest of all of them had been the late Agent Crawford. It was true that Jack had been a friend of sorts but if it came down to it there was nothing that Jack had done for Will without making him pay for it. And the price had always been a high one.

Will’s fingers mapped the other’s face. What would he give to be able to trust again, to feel intimacy with another person? It would be glorious to just let go for once in his life.

His train of thought was interrupted as Hannibal lowered himself. The older man’s face was suddenly in Will’s face, the other blocking out everything else from his sight. There was only Hannibal. There was his scent surrounding him, his body pressing him into the couch and the dark eyes fixing him as if pinning him into place with their stare.

“What is going on in that head of yours, Will? Sometimes it is like surfing channels on television. You never linger long enough at a place to truly grasp what it is all about.” The voice was so close that Will was convinced he could feel it vibrate in his body.

“There is nothing interesting enough to make a stay worthwhile.”

“Now, this is something I cannot believe. Your mind is fascinating and it is so unlike any other mind I have ever come across. I told you once that we are very much alike but still there is a profound dif-ference between the two of us, Will. Unlike you I am not trying to suffocate myself by killing off my mind.”

“Easy for you to say, you were always comfortable with thinking like that.” Will did not really want to discuss this topic now. He had felt so good only moments before Hannibal had once more started to analyze him.

“Like what, Will? Like people like us? If you would allow your mind some freedom, you would soon understand what I have been telling you for so long. What do you think it would be like to be like everyone else? It would be like being colorblind. Even if you do not want to admit it, you are used to thinking our way and you would find life to be unbearable if half of your senses were stripped away.”

Will had stilled all of his movements and for a brief second he thought that he had stopped breathing as well. The older man’s words made him ponder what had been said on this particular topic so far. He recalled talks with past therapists and explanations by experts that assured him that he was just confused and under shock from traumatic events in his past and that he would be normal again in no time. If people had not talked about him like he was ill, they had always tended to treat him like some weird specimen that had to be watched and closely monitored. The only persons who had treated him differently had been Jack Crawford and Molly. Both of them had dealed with it in their own way.

“Then set me free.”

How Will had dreaded this moment in the past. He had always been afraid that giving up the tight reign he had on his mind would lead to disaster. He was not sure if he was capable of controlling his mind if it was let lose and he had never believed to find anyone who was strong enough to take con-trol should he fail. But here he was, doing the unthinkable and giving his whole self to Hannibal, put-ting himself totally at the other man’s mercy.

The blond knew that there had been offers of this kind from the doctor in the past. True enough, they had not had the sensual flavor of what was offered to him now but the older man had tried to get a hold on Will for a long time. The intention behind it might have been a different one but the other had wanted to possess the blonde’s mind none the less.

It had been subtle at times but there had been so many attempts at taking over Will that it was a small miracle that he had been able to resist for such a long time. But Will had to admit that he did not want to resist this time.

At first there was no reaction to his words but then a fire emblazed in Hannibal’s eyes at Will’s surren-der. They had been gravitating to this moment ever since their good night on the front porch. The predator had finally caught his prey.

“I will not only set you free, Will, I will teach you to fly.”

The older man leaned slightly closer, their lips almost touching as he spoke. Will was able to feel the tightly leashed power in the other’s frame. It was like a putting the leash on a jaguar and trying to hold him back from his food. There was no chance that Hannibal would be able to restrain himself forever. Least of all since Will’s permission had been given.

“And fly you will, like the bird of prey you are.”

Will felt whatever tension that had been in his body from the day’s duress dissipate. His senses seemed to sharpen as he curiously waited for what was to come. He had no idea how Hannibal in-tended to make true on his word, but it did not really matter. The blonde felt freer than ever before just being promised freedom.

The other laid back down on top of Will, his arms lining the younger man’s sides. His fingers traced soft patterns over Will’s skin as he determinedly kissed the former FBI profiler. This time the kisses were far less innocent.


“Comes across all shy and coy,
Just another Nancy Boy”